A graphic design with a green background featuring a white crescent moon, a hexagon, and stars. Text in yellow, pink, and white reads: 'Somewhat Congruent + Aggressively Human.'

Somewhat Congruent + Aggressively Human

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Aggressively Human is the ongoing, unfiltered extension of my writing.

Unlike the Somewhat Congruent newsletter, which delivers short-ish, reflective insights, this page is for longer essays, bold reflections, and stories I can’t send in an email.
It’s where invisible labor, mental load, and the messy truths of life live in full view.

If you haven’t yet signed up for the inbox-friendly Somewhat Congruent newsletter, you can do that here.
Aggressively Human is separate, but complementary… think of it as the “full story” and unfiltered version of some of the insights you’ve read.

Candice Coughenour 3/16/26 Candice Coughenour 3/16/26

Aggressively Human: The Bloody Mental Load No One Sees

A bloody tampon and a missing trash bag revealed the invisible labor I’d been carrying for years and the mental load I finally stopped absorbing.

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phone: 412-444-5299

Email: candice@congruentsoultherapy.com

@congruentsoultherapy

CONGRUENT SOUL LLC

Candice Coughenour, LMFT
Congruent Soul Therapy
Therapy in Pittsburgh, PA

Pennsylvania | Georgia | Florida

Where am I still treating anticipated discomfort as proof that I should not ask for support? From a clinical perspective, many long-standing relational patterns are maintained not by lack of insight, but by nervous system predictions that have never been updated through lived experience. People-pleasing, over-adaptation, and chronic self-reliance often originate in environments where emotional needs were minimized, inconsistent, or unsafe to express. Over time, the nervous system learns to associate need expression with risk, including rejection, burdening others, or relational disruption. This leads to automatic inhibition of needs, even in safe or supportive contexts. Healing in this framework is not primarily cognitive. It is experiential. It occurs when new outcomes contradict old predictions in real time, allowing the system to update from learned fear to present reality. Self-trust is not built through certainty. It is built through experience and small action. If this resonates, you can learn more through the Congruent Soul Therapy Blog link in bio. Congruent Soul Therapy offers online therapy in Pennsylvania, Georgia, and Florida. Specialties include: • People-pleasing and self-abandonment patterns • Anxiety and overthinking • Nervous system regulation and burnout recovery • Emotional regulation and distress tolerance • Relationship dynamics and attachment patterns • Identity development and self-trust work #nervoussystemregulation #attachmenttheory #traumainformedtherapy #selftrust #peoplepleasingrecovery

No caption, meant for you 🤪 #tarot #silly #innerchild

What did I miss? What else isn't fine!? Comment below. I grew up not only thinking that was all fine, but that it was expected. People-Pleaser Recovery is taking small steps to take up space and ask for a f*ckton more than fine! Even now, I catch myself and remember that shit IS NOT FINE! Congruent Soul Therapy Online therapy for adults and couples looking for more than fine. Pennsylvania Georgia Florida Free Consultation Calls! Book online today! Link in bio #pittsburghtherapy #therapy #therapist #peoplepleaserrecovery #healingjourney

If I’ve learned anything for my years of being someone’s therapist it’s that it doesn’t have to be said perfectly but it does need said out loud. #therapistofinstagram #therapy #overthinking #healyourself #mentalhealthmatters

What no one taught us, yet we all desperately need to know. Congruency is aligning your thoughts, feelings, and actions with your core values. It’s not just doing what we were told to do, think, or be. It’s considering yourself even when someone else might “get pissed.” I specialize in working with people pleasers and overthinkers, and I see this show up all the time. Think of your life like a pie chart: Sometimes the “other” slice becomes so big that the “self” slice becomes tiny or disappears completely. You’re so focused on what everyone else needs, thinks, feels, or expects that you lose touch with yourself. And overthinking can be part of the same pattern. When the self is under-felt, we can end up overthinking instead of actually feeling and understanding what’s happening inside. Then we may either overact from impulse or underact through freeze Along the way, all of our pie charts shift. Sometimes we over-consider ourselves and forget to consider others. Sometimes we become so focused on the context or the needs of others that we forget to consider our own feelings. This isn’t necessarily good or bad. The goal is to understand our own stance and do our best to consider self, other, and context to the best of our ability. Not perfectly. Just a little more congruent than yesterday. Send this to someone who needs to see it laid out this way. Want to learn more or talk through how you can become more aligned and congruent? Congruent Soul Therapy offers free consultations. Link in bio #peoplepleasing #overthinker #therapy #congruency #selfworth

Take what resonates and leave the rest. #peoplepleaserrecovery #selfworth #therapy #voice #perfectionist

Your 30s is a GREAT ERA to FIND YOURSELF! Congruent Soul Therapy for people-pleasers ready to consider themselves and overthink less! Don't overthink it; the first 15-minute call is FREE! If you've been back and forth about starting therapy, this is your sign to start! If I am not a good fit, I will do my best to help you find someone who is! Let's heal this shit! Link in Bio #therapist #gatherapist #therapy #peoplepleaser #millennial

I could not have asked for a better trip! I connected with kick-ass therapists (peep THE Dani Brooks @counselingwith_dani 😂) and amazing businesses! I hung up my tear away flyers, handed out axolotl fidgets, and shared tokens of appreciation to the therapists that make georgia great!! Bonus side quests: strip club, waterfall, GF pita bread, expressive art session, roof top views and the botanical garden!! Special thanks to my cousin, without my trip would not have been possible!! P.s if you’re looking for a fantastic therapist in the Georgia area, I tagged nine amazing therapists in the pictures! #therapistsofinstagram #georgia #georgiatherapist #atlantatherapist #therapy

Validation isn’t just “good job” sometimes it reacting in a human way to fuck shit As a therapist i am an important tool in the therapy room and my face has subtitles…so i use them. Congruent Soul Therapy: helping people pleasers and perfectionists feel better than fine in PA and GA Disclaimer: For educational and entertainment purposes #healingjourney #mentalhealth #therapist #therapistsofinstagram #therapy 333

Congruent Soul Therapy
Online Anxiety Therapy for Adults throughout Pennsylvania, Georgia & Florida
Serving clients in Fox Chapel, Aspinwall, Cranberry, McCandless Township, Sewickley, Bethel Park, Upper St. Clair, mt. Lebanon, Peters Township, and surrounding areas (PA)

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