Everything Works Out in My Favor (Even When It Annoys Me)

Renovations Revelations #1: This is part of my ongoing Renovations Revelations series, where I share reflections and lessons from literal and metaphorical renovations in life.

I have paved my own path.

I ain’t ever going back.

That belief helps me propel forward.

Caution: some things will be “better,” and nothing will ever be the same.

So yes—be mindful of what you manifest.

That doesn’t mean don’t manifest.

It doesn’t mean don’t grow or change.

But it does prove the absolute necessity of mindfulness and gratitude.

A Real Example

I’m repainting my kitchen AGAIN because after I painted it, my dad came in and “fixed” it.

Which means he sanded it, replastered it, and made it “perfect.”

All I can hear is my dad saying:

“Well, we know how you are, Miss Perfect.”

when I mentioned not needing all these “fixes.”

Part of me gets triggered—because, well, first, I obviously get it from him! And second… how dare he!? (I’m working on that in therapy.)

And yes—those feelings are valid.

I can feel annoyed.

I can feel targeted.

AND.

It is also true that I am deeply grateful to live in a house rebuilt and renovated by the three men closest to me:

my partner, my dad, and my partner’s dad.

I’m standing in my kitchen, repainting over the now “perfect” spots my dad “fixed,” rolling my eyes—and also feeling gratitude and love—because this man cares enough to make it perfect, because that’s what he believes I deserve. (Even if it drives me nuts sometimes.)

Not that anything can ever actually be perfect.

But still…

He is doing what is in his circle of control to give me the best he can.

And I am grateful enough—and brave enough—to pause and recognize the joy while it’s happening.

And BOOM. Inspiration.

I will frame the perfection my dad gave me.

(I literally framed a piece of the wall he patched.)

And I will live every day in a kitchen my partner, my dad, and Ken made—loving it as long as I slow down enough to remember to do so.

The Lesson

I don’t share this to frame my life as “perfect.”

I share it to say: more than one thing CAN be true.

It doesn’t have to be all or nothing ALL the time.

I can be annoyed that I had to repaint my kitchen, and be grateful at the same time.

All I can do is consider myself long enough to slow down enough to be present enough to feel gratitude for exactly what I have.

(Mouthful, I know.)

I can learn from what I don’t like.

And I can love from what I do.

Congruency is holding both.

The “positive” and the “negative.”

Learning and loving.

I can validate the hurt from a comment AND love the intention and action behind it.

It’s all. And nothing. And everything in between.

Stop settling for only one truth at a time.

You deserve the best—so give it to yourself, and let yourself receive it from others, even when it’s messy.

You don’t chase.

You attract.

Everything you need to love and learn will meet you where you are.

And no—this path is never ONLY rainbows and butterflies.

You must learn from what’s in front of you and from what lives in your shadow.

A Congruent Self is light and shadow.

Mindfulness and gratitude are non-negotiable.

With gratitude and eye rolls,

Candice

P.S. If you’ve ever been frustrated and grateful at the same time, send this to someone who needs that reminder.

Two things can be true. And the more we talk about that, the less alone we feel in the messy middle.

Community starts when we normalize nuance.

If this resonated and you want to learn more: People-Pleasing & Boundaries or Overthinking & Decision Fatigue.